Monthly Archives: September 2016

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The Book That Will Release the Creative You

I’m here to tell you this is a worthy use of your life: both the grand calling of motherhood, and the smaller gifting of artistic self-expression.

~ from Life Creative by Wendy Speake and Kelli Stuart

A while back an article circulated Facebook with a title that sounded something like, “Back off Pinterest Mom. You’re making the rest of us look bad.” It seemed that there were quite a few women who felt particularly annoyed with the moms who turn simple snacks into elaborate cartoon characters and put together a creative concoction of homemade items for teacher gifts.

The article made me sad. Although I don’t consider myself to be particularly crafty, I certainly know the desire to find some kind of creative way to express myself in the midst of motherhood. In the middle of writing a book about my own desire for self-expression, I read the rant and knew my writing endeavor would upset the moms sharing that article. Because I intended to go all-out with my book like Pinterest Moms go all-out with their school snacks.

Reading the article made me sad for all women. Moms that create in the kitchen, women that throw elaborate parties, girls who sing their heart out instead of holding their voice in. With sentiments like “reign it in” circulating, no wonder we hold back. What if, instead of pressing each other into status quo-level confinement, we call out and celebrate creative self-expression in the midst of motherhood?

14317478_10153853027172555_3213682699467064735_nFrom Unfrozen to a Life Creative

The storytelling nature of Unfrozen: Stop Holding Back and Release the Real You was intended to help women who relate to my experience as someone who felt frozen from being able to express myself fully in relationships and in my creative contribution. I am excited to say that if you identified with my story, you will most certainly be nourished by a book that releases today.

Life Creative by Wendy Speake and Kelli Stuart (–>Website Here<–) is a composition of reflective teachings that call moms to open their minds and hearts to wrestle with their own desires for creative expression. The authors know the creative-mom struggle intimately, so they speak with compassion and authority.

One of my favorite aspects of this book is that it hits on both our need of living in the moment with our children and our longing to tap our creativity. “If you are smack-dab in the middle of this intense season of mothering right now, and the idea of carving out even a little time for your craft overwhelms your heart and your family balance, then take this woman’s wisdom to heart. Tuck away each torn out picture from a magazine, each story concept, each personal revelation that supports your vision. Jot it down and file it away, then move about your day with peace in your heart that the inspiration waits for you. This recorded book of ideas opens wide the gift of freedom, allowing you to live your dreams first.”

I echo that advice with a big and hearty “amen!” For years I’ve been filing away metaphors, stories, feelings and inspiration in journals and notebooks. These proved invaluable when my kids both started school and I began to write and speak with more intention. And now when I take walks by myself I turn on the voice recorder and document my musings on my phone.

The book also includes a section where the authors discuss another topic dear to my heart. “When the unique needs of a sensitive soul go unmet day after day, year after year, there is the tendency to spiral downward into the pit…Here’s an ugly truth: Sensitive people can be incredibly insensitive when they lose themselves. I’d never been an angry woman until the quiet spaces of my life were threatened.” Yes! Sensitivity and creativity often go hand-in-hand. If you were able to relate to the description of my angry outbursts in Unfrozen, you will certainly be nourished by the thoughts on sensitivity in Life Creative.

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Release the Creative You

The creative life of a mom is complicated and frustrating at times, but with the guidance of those moms who have gone before us, we can be released into the joy and freedom of a non-pressured creative self-expression right in the midst of mothering. Whether you’re a “Pinterest Mom,” a wanna-be blogger, or a master-schedule master, you can live this creative mom-life with great hope. There is so much more I could say but for now, I want to offer my thanks to Wendy Speake and Kelli Stuart for their hard work and beautiful mentorship through this book. They will help you release the Creative You.

“You are His Poem. Your heart and your art are His song to the world. Sing it loud.” ~ Life Creative

I’m guessing that many of you need this book. If you don’t think you do, I’m confident that someone you love needs this book. So I encourage you to (–>Click Here<–) and buy it today before you forget.

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Is It Bad To Love Performing?

Our family loved offering our performance as a gift to others. However, the wise reminders to use my voice for God raised a concern in me that perhaps my intense desire to perform wasn’t good. I wanted to share the song in my heart, but I didn’t want anyone to believe I was doing it for the wrong reasons. If they thought I was looking for applause, they wouldn’t respect me. They wouldn’t listen to me and truly consider what I was saying.

Excerpt from UNFROZEN: Stop Holding Back & Release the Real You

Sweet Performers

It was dark out as we drove home from our first of three trips to The Dance Factory that week. As crazy as it sounds, I don’t mind the 15-minute drive. I enjoy the quiet moments to contemplate life while she’s in class and the few minutes of random conversation with her in the car. The ride home that night started like most others.

“How was dance tonight?” I asked my precious almostimg_7035
-9-year-old who sat staring out the window behind me.

“Good. We got to start learning our dance for recital.” A few blocks and bits of conversation later and Amelia casually inquired, “Why did you put me in dance?”

Her tone indicated a simple curiosity, so I answered simply. “Well, when we first moved here I wanted you to have the opportunity to be in a class. You were almost 4 years old and you love to dance, so we signed you up.” She giggled in affirmation. Our white caravan creaked down the dark road on the outskirts of town as I continued, “You complained about it constantly that first year. I assumed it was because you were required to work at paying attention the whole time. When summer came, I was ready to forget dance. But your dad wanted you to stick with it for a number of reasons and so we did. That next year you started to love it!”

“Because I got to perform!” Amelia revealed. We pulled up to a stoplight and I glanced in the rearview mirror at her softly lit grin.

Ah yes. My eyes went back to the road while my mind went back to the moment we realized we had a performer on our hands. She was 5 the first year she got to perform on stage at the spring recital. Her sequined costume wasn’t the only reason she lit up the stage that night. When Amelia stepped out under the lights, her entire being sparkled with joy. It still does. Every time.

I smiled as the breaks squeaked up to the next stoplight, because I get it. I’m a performer, too. Something in both Amelia and I turns on when we are in the spotlight. I can’t speak for her, but I know what goes on inside of me. I stand taller, dig deeper and release a more expressive version of myself. It’s as if I intuitively know that my self-expression is more than a single person can handle, so I save it for a crowd. The more people in the audience, the less of me one individual must hold. The more people in the audience, the more I can release. And I have a lot to release.

Performers get a bad rap.

Performers are often labeled as attention-seeking and fake. But great performers are some of the most self-sacrificing and genuine people I know. They are more true to themselves on stage than in conversation. Why? Because they were made for it. Something in them turns on when they step into the spotlight and they are free to release themselves with an intensity of expression that no single conversation can hold.

Performance is an opportunity for artists to transform their intense barrage of thoughts and feelings and turn them into a passionate expression. What feels like a self-centered battle on the inside becomes an others-centered song, dance, poem or painting on the outside. True performance, in my view, is not self-expression for the sake of self. It is disciplined self-expression for the sake of others.

So I admit it.

I take my young daughter to dance classes three nights a week because she is a performer. She needs it like she needs air to breathe. And I want my little performer to gain the humble confidence she needs to move with grace so she can express a true and transformed version of herself that blesses everyone around her.

Do any of these descriptions of performing resonate with you? Do you hold back so others won’t judge you as being dramatic or attention-seeking?

Portions of this post were originally published on Her View From Home

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Our Kids and Their Roadside Coffee Shop Mission

It was nearly 9:00, and I was ready to finish tucking my daughter in bed. Amelia, however, wasn’t ready for me to leave. She had more to say, and I could tell by her pursed brow that something was weighing heavily on her heart. I leaned on her pillow and looked into her eyes.

“Mom, do you remember the other day when we saw a man on the street with a sign that said,

‘No cash, just food’?”

“Yes.”

“Well, things like that make me really sad. I mean, I wanted to do something to help him. Selah [her cousin] does things for others. She had a bake sale and raised money for a dog shelter in her town. I want to do something like that.”

“What do you have in mind?”

She knew that she didn’t have school the next day, and Amelia is not one to wait around. “Can I have a lemonade stand in the morning to raise money for the homeless shelter?”

I agreed to her plan, but it changed that morning when she realized how cold it was. Rather than selling lemonade, Amelia recruited her brother to sell coffee. They ran an extension cord out to the grinder and coffee pot and put up a sign explaining their mission. In 90 minutes, they sold 3 cups, which, theoretically, would have earned $3. But they finished with much more.

“Mom!” Grant ran inside. “Someone just gave us $100!!!”

Apparently, a couple who called each other “Grandma” and “Grandpa” decided that since the money was going toward such a worthy cause, they’d make an extra donation. My sister shared about the roadside coffee shop on Facebook, and her friend in Virginia donated too. Amelia threw in a little of her own money to total $118!

We decided to meet Aaron [my husband, their dad] at The Connection Homeless Shelter during his lunch, and the kids donated the money they’d raised. The director, Beth DeFreece, graciously accepted the donation and then offered to give us a tour of their facility. As she showed us around, she explained some of their procedures and the services that they offer. Amelia and Grant were particularly interested in the family play area with all the toys. They left feeling good about their contribution, but sad that the shelter is necessary at all. Hearing about the difference the shelter is making in our community impressed and moved us.

How Splashes Become Waves

This blog and my book (here) are driven by my desire to see people live into the fullness of who they’ve been created to be and to use their voices rather than holding them back. I believe that when we each figure out when and how we want to stand up and speak up with love, we end up encouraging others to use their gifts and voices as well. Amelia demonstrated the truth of this today.

The ripple effect is one of my favorite metaphors. I love the idea that one splash can create momentum that reaches far beyond the initial point of impact. The ripples continue and even band together to create waves with an accumulation of splashes. And once they’re moving, no one even realizes where that initial splash originated. It doesn’t matter anymore because the wave is much bigger than any one ripple or a single splash could ever make.

Our kids’ donation to The Connection Homeless Shelter is a part of a much bigger story.

My daughter didn’t get the idea to do a project and donate the money from me. She really didn’t come up with the idea all on her own either. She admires her cousin. Selah used her gifts to do something special for a special cause, and then she shared her experience with Amelia.

 

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Inspired by Selah, Amelia came up with her own plan to help others and invited her brother to join her. Amelia and Grant then experienced the joy of working together and of giving others the opportunity to donate to their cause.

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My sister Daniele and I amplified their little “voices” by telling others on Facebook, which gave someone else the opportunity to be a part of their morning mission.

When we visited the shelter, the director accepted their offering and then gave them something in return – the opportunity to learn more about the bigger picture of helping others in our community.

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Now I get to blog about it! I’m using my gifts and my voice to amplify the message of the shelter (video below) and hopefully inspire others to keep this little wave going. But the big question is, what will you do with it? Will you read this blog post, feel good for a moment and then forget it? Or will you let it sink in and stir something in you?

Ask yourself this question:

“What do I want to do now?”

Don’t ask what you should do. That question creates pressure that can cloud the vision of what you’re really called to do. Today was the first time our kids were ready to initiate this action. I’ve mentioned things in the past; but, when they didn’t take to the idea, I didn’t try to convince them of anything. Last week Amelia’s heart was struck by the gentleman on the street holding a sign, and the timing was just right. I’m glad we didn’t pressure them to try to come up with something before today. The impact of the moment was greater because they took initiative rather than doing it as an “assignment” to help others.

So don’t get caught up in the pressure of asking what you should do. Instead, call on that loving, joyful place in your heart, and ask what you want to do with your own gifts and your own voice.

Here are a few ideas.

  • Support others with prayer, finances and/or creating jobs.
  • Donate needed items to your local homeless shelter. When I asked the director of The Connection what they could use right now, she offered the following list: pillows, single sheet sets, blankets and laundry detergent.
  • Donate items to thrift stores that benefit local homeless shelters. The Connection is also in need of volunteers to help run their thrift stores Monday through Saturday, between the hours of 10-4. (They have a fabulous community atmosphere, so it’s a great way to get involved and truly be a part of something that matters!)
  • Donate money or even raise money through “roadside coffee shops,” lemonade stands, garage sales, bake sales, etc. Let your imagination run wild!
  • Tell your kids about other kids who raise money and be willing to follow their lead in sharing their own gifts and interests for worthy causes. Let them take their donations in person so they can experience the joy of helping others, possibly meet influential members of their community, and learn something new along the way.

Do you have a special story to share? In the comments below, please give a shout-out to someone who has inspired you to use your gifts and voice. And if you or your kids do something in response to this story, please let us know!

Please consider sharing this post to keep the message going.

And now, here is Beth DeFreece of The Connection Homeless Shelter in North Platte with a special announcement.

Video from Andrea Wenburg on Vimeo.